how do i explain to my kids that people can do the wrong thing but that doesn’t erase all the good things they’ve done before.
how do i explain to my kids that someone can care about them yet leave without warning, leave without saying goodbye, disconnect her phone and provide no forwarding address.
how can i explain to my kids that sometimes people cannot deal with their lives and have to move on but it has NOTHING TO DO WITH MY KIDS.
when someone hurts my babies, my heart aches- it aches in my belly- you know that pit in your stomach that shows up every few hours reminding you that you feel like crap.
you know that pit that feels empty yet full of sadness, disappointment and confusion. that pit that serves as an almost constant reminder that you’ve been wronged. that pit that reminds you that you cannot protect your children from every ounce of hurt they will feel.
that pit that makes me want to f’ing scream and cry at the same time.
part of my job as a mommy is to allow my kids to feel sadness, to feel disappointment, to allow life to happen even when life isn’t all that sweet. i believe that working through these complicated emotions my children will learn they can get over a bad experience, a rotten day at a school, unrequited love, mean kids on the playground, and someone they cared about dropping out of their lives for no good reason. by allowing my children to process their pit in the belly ichy feelings my kids will grow up to be adults who will take life’s disappointments in stride.
i am a really sensitive girl, a wear her heart on her sleeve kind of woman, i can feel upset by someone looking at me the wrong way. but nothing feels quite as bad as seeing my children feel sadness and knowing i cannot take the pain away. i can ease the pain, i can comfort my kids, but ultimately time will have to make it all ok- i just hope it’s sooner than later.
9am wednesday morning update:
she texted me this morning saying she had no strength to say goodbye but she will send a note to my kids explaining herself and saying a proper goodbye. at least my kids will be feel better but keithy says she’s still a douchebag.