2 plane rides, 1 xanax, 10 days of miami sun.
what does it say about me that i imagined how good it would feel to get back in my bed before i had even left for florida?
and oh…happy new year.
made it to midnight without tears. kissed my husband and went to sleep. (kids were already sleeping- both managed to catch colds while we were away).
got up this morning, took the kids to the pediatrician, took them back home. ran to the market. cried in the aisles.
checked out of the market ($75!) and drove home.
i don’t want to be sad.
but here it is new year’s day and i feel sad. i miss my mom.
"i love you, i’m sorry" she said.
you have nothing to be sorry about mom.
i’m sorry we couldn’t save you.
everyday i am sorry we couldn’t save you.
but i won’t let it linger today.
i am healing.
the tears don’t have to go on and on anymore.
it has been a much needed vacation. quality time with family and friends. laughter.
almost ready to go back to work.
will be ready monday.
xxx
jennifer
aim: whateverradio
facebook: jennifer koppelman hutt
Susan says
I am sorry that you are sad. It is so hard! Loving and letting go is not an easy task. I lost my husband in the Iraq war – almost five years now. He talks to me -asked me to let him go because he has a lot of work to do in Heaven. It hurts to look at the children left behind. Constant reminders…Time is our friend. Love you even though I don’t personally know you.
Pru says
Jennifer, you write in such a lovely way about your mother. I have read your blog for a long time now, and you seem to be getting stronger and stronger.
Happy New Year.
Pru
abby says
You are a beautiful girl, inside and out.
Mary says
Jennifer, your mom is always with you and she doesn’t want you to be sad. Remember the good times and be at peace. Move on but take your good memories with you and be sure to share them with your children and your family. Do not beat yourself up.
Peace and Happy New Year.
deBee says
{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}
marlee says
Jennifer – I hope 2009 brings you more healing and peace.
Tresha68 says
Jennifer and Susan-
I do not know either one of you, but I pray that the New Year brings you both peace.
Jennifer my dear, I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time. I do believe that your mother, any mother, would want you to move on and live, love and laugh in her memory. She would want you to be happy for time is short and before you know it you may have lost some of the most precious time with your own children and husband. I pray that you can laugh a little more this year with a smile in your heart.
Jen says
It’s great to hear from you Jennifer, I’ve missed hearing you guys live!
grateful one.... says
Thank you.
Thank you for this.
I broke up with my 10 year boyfriend last night. Long story short…he is a douche bag and I am stupid.
I’ve been crying…thinking I lost a love.
You dear woman, have truly lost a loved one. You have put it in perspective for me.
Thank you.
I hope that each day brings you a bit of peace. She will always be with you and part of you.
Nicole E says
Jennifer, Happy New Year.
I know HOW HARD it is…. Xmas and New Years is very hard for me also. It’s been 2 years and I cry ALL the time.
You write such nice tihngs and it’s nice you have a place to express yourself. All the best for this upcoming year and a year filled with happiness, love and success.
Arlene says
🙂
Kym says
Jennifer~~lost my Dad in March and can absolutely relate to your reaction to the holidays! Both my Dad and your Mum are in a much better place and are with us every moment of the day! May the new year bring all of us PEACE HEALTH HAPPINESS AND just a wee bit of PROSPERITY (God knows we could all use some!) Be well and safe and ENJOY!
ps/missed you guys~~looking forward to Monday! YEAH!
loyal listener says
can’t wait until the show is live again! your daily dose of humor is missed!
J-Sto says
Learning to live with the loss of a loved one is ongoing. I lost my father 5 years ago in December, and it still helps at times fo me to cry and talk about him. Even though it is something we all eventally go through, the fear of losing a parent is something we tuck away when we are small children. When it happens, we are taken back to a time much earlier in our lives.
Best wishes for 2009 to you, Jennifer.
Margaret in Maine says
Go ahead and cry, girl…2008 sucked and bid it goodbye! Here’s to a healing 2009 with many good memories to come. Happy New Year, Jennifer.
CK NJ says
your strong for your children, as your mother was for you….no matter how sad we become….that in itself is your healing. Strength and peace in 2009 for you and yours.
leo says
Kissed your husband and went to sleep on New Years????? That’s the night to screw.
Ted Perlman says
Your Mom was a truly blessed woman. What she and your father did for Linda guaranteed her a place in Heaven reserved for the likes of Saints, etc.. I am truly sorry for your loss.
Ted Perlman
Producer-Arranger-Composer-Guitarist
ted@tedperlman.com
http://www.tedperlman.com
http://www.myspace.com/tedperlman
CleveShe says
Jennifer, we will always miss our mothers. The pain becomes more dull with time. I often think of my mom looking down and saying, “Look what I left behind.”
She did good, so did your mother. The loss you express confirms that. To 2009 and on we go…
Lauren Miller-Walsh says
It’s OK to cry, Jennifer. If it makes you feel better, cry a little everyday. Hang in there.
Vinny says
Welcome home and I hope as this new year progresses, so does your happiness. It’s OK to cry, good to cry; let it out.
Mica says
Happy New Year Jen, you did good. It’ll get easier, but you never forget a missed loved one, especially a parent.
xoxo
Erica from Ohio says
Happy New Year, Jen. I am sorry you are sad, but glad that you are healing. Will be glad to have you back. We missed you and Alexis these past two weeks, but you both deserved a long vacation. Love ya!!
J says
Love you Jen
iz says
missing my husband who left me for someone else,need to forget, thinking of taking my college daughter for along weekend in Miami, never been, where’s a great place to stay on the beach where we can walk to restaurants etc a much needed getaway.
JenniferM says
Happy New Year, Jennifer
Rachel says
Jennifer,
Peace to you in 2009.
Your mother is always with you in your heart.<3
cindy riley says
My beautiful mother passed away Tuesday morning, December 23rd. She was with me at home, under Hospice. She had gall bladder cancer. We fought it for 11 months~now I don’t know what to do. I have grown children and a wonderful husband and family, but I feel so alone. She was my best friend. Thank you for sharing what you are going through. It has helped me cope a bit better. No one really understands the pain unless they also have lost their Mom. It is so hard to talk about it~thank you, again. Cindy
Alicia in New Rochelle says
I am so sorry for your sadness. My mom passed 3 yrs ago Nov. 4 and the feelings are different each year. She whispered the same words to me… she looked at me saying “I’m so sorry” ever so softly but with such intensity… I’ve never shared this with anyone. Until now. In reading your heartfelt words, I am sad when I think back to the things I try to put away, but I am comforted to know I am not alone in the feelings (which are all completely normal). While this is easier said, I pray you also find some comfort in knowing you are not alone in your feelings. You are absolutely healing, Jennifer. And you are such a beautiful soul. Wishing you peace, love and light.
kathie says
Lots of first’s. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, as time ticks by and you get stronger. What a blessing to have such warm wonderful memories. The time will come when they only bring you a feeling of love and comfort, not pain and hurt. The time will come.
shiryl says
Our Moms are so special and we miss them terribly. Our memories keeps them close. Love your show!
camille says
(((hugs))) to you, Jennifer. your mom will always be there when you need her most.
Lisa says
Why is it that you are such a self-pitying, attention-seeking, wreck? You constantly flaunt your wealth and entitlements and then collapse in a puddle of “poor me,” and it’s boring. Maybe you should speak to your therapist about why you are compelled to do this? Do you really think your “fans” are tuning in to hear you and not Alexis, the actually interesting one?
Kathy G says
It will get easier Jennifer, promise!
Marlene says
Happy New Year Jen! I’m sorry you are still going through some sadness, but you are coming along…I am going through some sadness also, my mom has been in hospital for 1 month and I miss our phone calls the most. She is on a ventillator and can not talk, it is so hard. Old habits are very hard to break!
Barbara says
Jennifer-Healing takes as long as it takes. She has only been gone a couple of months! It will come…you will feel better.I wish you Peace in 2009!
Sue/Indiana says
jen…..everyone was put on earth for a reason…..your reason has to be….communication!!!!! You are so good at it. Whether you’re talking..singing…or writing …you talk to peoples souls.
Christine says
Jennifer-My thoughts are always with you when I read your blog, you are a very special person, mother and wife….just take it day by day and we all understand what you are going through as I am sure this has touched each one of your fans in one way or another…you are doing well and we love you very much!
Christine says
Lisa:
I hope you experience nothing but sadness and pain in 2009.
You’re an asshole. Why read Jennifer’s blog, why listen to the show if you’re so filled with contempt for jennifer?
My God. I hate plenty of people and you won’t see me reading their blogs.
Jennifer: What can I say. It sucks. There is a hole in your heart that nobody can fill. Chin up. Keep writing. I know you don’t see a therapist, so keep writing. It will eventually help.
To the rest of you f*** heads….back off or better yet, drop dead..
deBee says
Jennifer, if goes without saying that L&*’s post should be ignored. No matter what your financial status you have the right to grieve how ever you want. Your true fans care about you and hope you feel better in 2009. Can’t wait for the new Show on Monday!
abw says
Look, I think Lisa’s delivery was a little off, but the sentiment is closer…if I were to grieve publicly for an extended period of time, I would expect that not everyone would be thrilled to listen. Grieve however you like, for as long as you like, but don’t be terrible surprised and offended if it tends to be a bit much for people sometimes. If you had to listen to someone doing that constantly, your listeners would undoubtedly be treated to a litany of how lame/pathetic/boring/unworth your time they were.
kim says
Thank you Susan….saying “time is your friend” really spoke to me. Sometimes just breathing in and out is hard because of who I lost.
April from the old days says
Lisa – You discust me and you embarrass yourself. I cannot stand you and I do not even know you. Go away.
jana says
Don’t overthink it. Grief’s a process-the lows suck but in the end it’s kind of a gift. You learn something about yourself along the way. Try not to be so hard on yourself. Be sad…and then remember to be happy too.
Carroll Crispo says
Two words:
SLEEP SHTUP
Debra - Australia says
I feel so sad for you Jennifer. I can only imagine the loss you feel. You should be ashamed of yourself Lisa. Why bother even coming here…did it make you feel good?? Lowlife.
caramia says
Unless you hatched from an egg under a goose or duck we will all walk in these shoes someday. I did last year in August with my Dad and this year in September with my Mom. The pain and the grief are overwhelming and the holidays only call more attention to the fact that our loved ones are gone. Thank God its January 2 and they are over. Time is our friend and will help to heal us all. Hang in there Jennifer – you are telling your story here for all of us who are grieving.
Felicia says
Thank you for taking to the time to share with us, and Happy New Year to you too!
Deanna S says
Hey Jennifer – this just breaks my heart. Moms are everything to their kids if they were a good mommy. This kills me because although my mom has not died yet, I’ve lost friends, loved ones and many things so I think I can understand your pain even though I haven’t experienced that exact thing yet. It’s so weird to do something that you do all the time when one of the key figures is no longer there, especially your mother. I’m glad you were able to find joy and laughter in spite of it. Happy Hanukkah – Best Wishes – your strength and sense of humor on the show helps a lot of people I’m sure and I hope that has helped to carry you through. I’m not a wishy washy person but you can’t help but be moved by things like this and if a person doesn’t get it their heart is cold and black. Don’t let anyone sway you. You’re a great friend to Alexis and have in just this short time even been a great friend to me!
Haeri says
@Lisa and abw – I’ve been going through Jennifer’s blog, and I don’t see her publicly mourning every other entry. It’s a new year; her mother’s not around to see it, so I EXPECT to hear she’s still grieving. Thanks for starting the disgusting conflict between compassion and misanthropy in my heart.
big_pete says
Obviously Lisa gets a thrill out of being an asshole.I can picture her at her computer diddling herself as she wrote her comment and she probably had an orgasm…good for you lisa your a genuine asshole.
Glenn says
These posts for your mother are some of the most moving things I have ever read. I pray, regardless of of my agnostic ways, that you and your family will find peace regarding her passing.
to abw says
Dude, Lisa’s delivery was not a “little off” and you are another a-hole! Extended period of time my butt…it has been about 6 months…that is anything but extended. This wasn’t a puppy that she had for a few short years, it was her mother for crying out loud.
You and Lisa should go eff yourselves…this was HER MOTHER…not a coworker, not a neighbor…her mother.
Extend this you bitches.
Vinny says
To Lisa. You are just a heartless and mean Bitch! You will get yours!
Pat Rule says
Jennifer,
Do you realize you are on a show with Martha Stewart and her daughter. Whom do you think the viewer wants to hear from? Who are you? Who cares. Can you be quiet once in a while and let us get to know Alexis!!!! Zip it!
JoAnn says
Jen, three of my best girlfriends lost teenage sons and it has been YEARS LATER and they still cry about it. Don’t think there is something wrong with you if you are still sad/crying/depressed. It’s normal. Grief counseling does help despite your thoughts on therapy and you might try it. God bless you and your family.
JoAnn says
OMG, I just read the comments. Lisa, are you even a human or are you a fallen angel? What does wealth have to do with sorrow? You are a moron and it’s took bad Alexis and Jennifer can’t ban idiots like you from listening to the show, much less blogging. You need help.
Vinny says
Pat Rule, speak for yourself. You and that other Bitch Lisa should get together and be miserable C**** together.
AgreesWithLisa says
Lisa has a point. Who of us hasn’t lost someone very dear in their life? We all grieve, but this excessive, public self-pity is indulgent. Clearly Jennifer was either very spoiled in her formative years (spoiled children – use to having their way – are often crippled when confronted with realities that they can’t conform to their desire), or she’s desperate for attention, or its some combination of both. In any case, its getting to be a bit much. No one’s asking her to stop grieving, but why does she feel compelled to show it to us? She really does need some therapy – not just to help her grieve, but also to address some of these other glaring complexes.
Erin from Pittsburgh says
Missed hearing your live voice the last two weeks. Thought of you and hoped you were able to relax. Don’t know what else to say but looking forward to 5:00 on Monday.
Garth from Avon, CT. says
Lisa: See You Next Tuesday.
Jennifer: Hang in there. We love you
Christina says
I Understand your pain…I lost my Dad in 1977….lost my brother in 2004….my ex-husband, who was a great friend and helping me get passed this died Jan 13th 2006 and my dear sweet Grandmother who took care of both of my kids and was the cornerstone of our family passed in Oct 2008. Time helps…but everyday I hear them and remeber the good times and their advice…I wish they were here of course….but I know they are with me everyday…..helping me through….u will make it!!! U r Strong!!!!
My Thoughts and Prayers are with u and UR Family!!!
Mary Kay says
I know your pain. I think talking about it helps. Glad you had fun moments and please remember, life is made up of those moments. So, hold onto the good things and your mom was one of those!
Teena says
Miss Jennifer, I’m new to even knowing you exist! Just started watching the Whatever show and well, I LOVE IT! I see from past posts that you are grieving the loss of your mother. Which is what you need to do, and how you do it, that is your business. We all grieve in different ways. What blows my mind is the negative comments on YOUR blog! I always find it fascinating how some people love the sound of their own voice and their own opinions so much, they’ll say anything or write anything! Talk about being self centered! Why would you take the time to come onto someone else’s blog to write something negative? Unless you thought it was ALL ABOUT YOU!!
I have nothing bad to say to you, and as the saying goes…if you can’t say something nice dumb*@@, don’t say nothing AT ALL!!!!!
Take care, you gals keep trying to piss Martha off, LOL, and blogging your heart out!
SteakUmmmm says
Goody Monday is only a day away you girls will be back!
caramia says
If you don’t like what Jennifer says in her blog then dont’ read it.
Since when does loving your mother make you spoiled?
kelleyfrances says
My Dad died one year ago on January 6th of a massive heart attack. He was 68. Ironically, my Mom was visiting me out west and my Dad had elected not to take the trip this year. He called my sister to say he was having chest pains. By the time she arrived minutes later, he was lying on the floor. He looked at her with horror in his eyes and then passed.
While trasporting him to the hospital, my sister called me and my Mom. It was early in the morning. When she told me, I stood speechless, hoping she could take it back so that I wouldn’t have to look at my Mom’s questioning eyes, knowing I was about to devestate her world. I bent to the floor and rubbed my Mom’s legs as she sat in a chair and as gently as I could, I told that Dad had just died.
I live my life with utter appreciation for what I have. I refuse to regret that I wasted one day not telling my family that I love them. I speak to my father every single day. I think he’s listening. I hope he’s listening. I’m depending on it.
The thought that he is lost to me forever…kills me. So I just believe. I believe that he is with me. That he mourns for my sadness and that he prays for my tears to stop.
I focus on living my life as positively as possible. I stopped eating crap. I started walking every day. And I told myself that I would do my best to live to be 100 for the sake of my kids.
I learned a very important lesson. OMG. My parents loved us so much. They sacrificed so much for us. They loved me like I love my kids. Wow! I never thought of it that way.
There was no greater meaning for his life. No celebrity accomplishment. But he LOVED us! That realization, at the deepest core, has really impacted me.
I feel your pain. I shed your tears. Usually when I’m in the shower or staring at his eyes in my mirror. I miss everything. The smell of him. They way he bit his lip when I boarded a plane after a two-week visit. How he would wave with one hand while the other was slipped into his pant pocket. And his grin. He would smile and wave a full arm wave.
I don’t know when your mom passed. I didn’t read that far back. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is that you are NOT alone. We are in this club together. Oddly, I will think of you in your pain as I think of others that I see on the news or read in the paper. I know we are strangers but I hope that you feel some validation that it’s “okay” to just plunk down and let it out. I do too.
The rest of the time I try to love, laugh, compliment others, reach out, volunteer, teach and be happy in the moment.
Friend Out West
Lynne says
Jennifer, A while back, a dear friend told me that the reason people like Lisa etc., exist is to remind the rest of us that we’re not like them…
Stefanie says
I lost my husband to suicide four years ago. It turned my world upside down and I have been at a standstill in my life eversince. Somehow this year I expected something magical to happen on New Year’s Eve. I wanted to come out of this holiday energized and ready to bitch slap 2009 into submission. However, I woke up depressed and unable to think of anything or anyone other than my husband. The old addage, true love lasts a lifetime always sounded like bull, but it’s true. You will always miss your mom and you will always have bad days. I’m sure you’ve heard it all when it comes to grief. Just go with it. I just cry and dust myself off again. Just thought I would say that because everyone in my life seems to think I should be “over it”.
Stefanie
amyrabuf says
Happy New Year! People do you think it is possible for just one day on Jennifers blog that we can have good words for all? It’s getting old to hear how jealous people are of Jennifer and Alexis,the trashing of their personell lives., their shopping and their baking just to name a few. Oh and LISA, are you from Avon Ct., if so it explains not having a heart???? Glad you are back Jennifer. Looking forward to hearing the new show today. Amy
NOLA says
Losing your mother is not a license to stop living. You are a mother now, act like it!
@Kelleyfrances says
Kelleyfrances, no one read that novel you wrote, including Jennifer. Come on people – if you want folks to read your comments, be concise; anything over 5 lines is too long.
my guess about the secret friend ? says
ROSIE!
msmpt says
My mom also died of pancreatic cancer and I miss her and remember her every day. Although it’s trite and I’m sure you’ve heard it every day since she died, it will get better as the time passes. A special hug for you.
tracy in pa:) says
hey jennifer…
it never goes away…but it will get easier…just love your kids… you’re a wonderful mom….. if i was there…i’d give you the biggest hug ever…. and don’t listen to some of these idiots on here who think you’re going overboard greiving…. i hate people… most suck…. please take care and know your not alone… tracy in pa
abw says
I love having and stating an opinion and being called a bitch…
ya know ya know? You know? says
you know things could be worse whatever!!!!
marcia says
jennifer, i am 59 years old and my mother died 13 years ago. I still miss her terribly, there isn’t a day go by that i don’t think of her. My mother died suddenly, i think it is especially hard to deal with the passing of a loved one if you have to watch them suffer, as you had to. God bless you and your family. You are a tribute to your mother
Dresden Disney-Dior says
I love reading this blog, and for the most part, I love reading the responses.
I just dont understand the cruelty — especially that of NOLA.
“Losing your mother is not a license to stop living. You are a mother now, act like it!”
Jennifer has NOT stopped living and most impotantly, she hasn’t stopped LOVING! Jennifer, is doing th BEST she can while coping with a great loss. Jennifer leans on us — she leaves her grief here. Her children are not exposed to it. I feel Jennifer is a GREAT Mother — just like Bunny. Warm, nurturing, caring, sensitive to her children’s needs, and FUN. I’ll bet Jennifer’s house is filled with laughter, while her blog weeps. From what I’ve learned about Bunny, she was a Mom to EVERYONE. To her own children and to those who needed a kind word, a cookie and a glass of milk, or new shoes. Jennifer is LIKE her Mom.
To the person who said, “Jennifer and Alexis don’t read our responses” — who would BLAME them. I wouldn’t read the responses either.
Dresden Disney-Dior says
Re: Kelleyfrances
To @Kelleyfrances — I’m sorry you’re unable to read more than 5 sentences. You missed out.
WHO CARES if Alexis or Jennifer reads our comments — OTHERS read our comments and if we take the time to read the comments posted here, we learn — we connect — we laugh — we cry.
It’s a way to cope.
Kindness is the answer.
Be kind. Just be kind.
Love,
Dresden
Lisa says
I am intrigued by the spew of hate my comment inspired from some of the listeners (talk about issues – it was like a geyser opened up, glad to provide some relief for some of you who needed someone to take out your anger on). Obviously I like the show and like both Jennifer and Alexis, otherwise, I would not listen… BUT, I’m just being honest when I say that Jennifer’s public grief is boring. Hey, we’ve all been through it. Can you imagine the reaction you’d get from family, friends, and coworkers if that was you? She doesn’t write about it everyday? She writes about it a lot… too much. As for all of the “hate you, wish you would die, bitch, bitch, bitch” thrown my way, think about your own delivery before you criticize someone elses (by the way I do think my own delivery was bad). If you’re going to write a blog, and be a radio show host, you’d better be ready to listen to some feedback that isn’t all “I love you, you’re wonderful, you’re beautiful…” kiss-up crap.
Suzie says
I have to laugh when I read these comments. You people who profess your love and imagine yourselves personal friends of Jennifer and Alexis are just too funny! Don’t think for a minute your kiss-ass ways are going to get you a seat at the rich-girls’ table. Get a life!!
Lisa in Hawaii says
What is a blog but the 21st century version of a journal? If I were to look back at my journals from ’92 –when my dad died– or ’97 –when my brother left his body– I’d find that most of what I wrote was related to the grieving process. All these years later I still have my moments of intense sadness, of missing them, and the tears still o=come as though it were yesterday. Writing about it was a very cathartic form of healing. NOT that it will ever be something I could “get over” –I will not. How cold is the heart –if one does actually beat– in a person who would say things like “Lisa”, NOLA and a few others have said here? Maybe (the other) Lisa should be the one to get some therapy; it may help her deal with her own issues of resentment of the wealth of others, failure to feel compassion and compulsion to insult those she feels are more financially secure than herself! Aside from her callous comment regarding grief, what was up with that parting shot? That was uncalled for and ugly! Jennifer you are right on track. It comes in waves, just keep riding them out. As to the anonymous “@ ____” (fill in blank) person who counts words and scolds those of us who go over his/her determined “limit” I’ll try to be as concise as possible: ESAFO!
Danielle D. says
Hi Jennifer. I’m a friend of Holly’s and wanted to tell you that I love your blog. The vegan dessert information was wonderful, the Rosie interview was a lot of fun, and I love how candid and honest you are when talking about your mother. I’ve only heard the greatest and funniest stories about her (through Holly)!
April says
I have to weigh in on this discussion. I don’t think the first Lisa has issues and resentment with wealth, I THINK she is saying that because Jennifer is used to being revered by everyone because she has money (and power only by that money and who she knows), she tries to keep herself the center of attention. Unfortunately, Jennifer doesn’t realize that the poor me act is getting boring because some of her listeners (the adoring ones) keep the accolades coming. Because that is what Jennifer so desperately needs, she keeps the poor me’s coming. Her public grieving is a request for sympathy plain and simple. This is not a private journal, it is a blog for everyone to read and comment on. So, let’s respect other’s opinions and comments. Those who don’t aren’t such good people themselves. I’m sure Jennifer doesn’t read this and it’s a shame because it provides such much needed feedback and perhaps a wakeup call.
Suzanne says
Hi, Jennifer. I love your radio show, your TV show, and your honesty! I thought you might like the book “Broken Open” by Elizabeth Lesser. Might help you find the silver lining in the pain.
marlene says
hi Jen Noi stillthink you guys are boring,but i do try from time to time to seeif things changed any with the showi couldnt helpbut read about you mom I am truly sorry as I said i lost mineto lung cancer,now my dad beat prostrate cancer,but they just found it in his skull,ribs,and other areasthey cant cure it but they said they can keep it under control.I stillafter 14yrs cry for my mom it will always hurt never go away.Sorry i truly am.I am going to get tested for blatter,or kidney cancer I have blood in my pee.well again I will say a prayer for you and I will be more understanding and willlisten to your show never talk bad things again about it.Sorry hope you can forgive me for the mean comments I have ever wrote.
Den says
Jenn!
You rock!
Sarah says
Speaking personally I wish I could do what Jennifer is doing and blog about my loss extensively — but there are boundaries and I have to say that some of us don’t have the money to go to a resort, to get away—so reading Jennifer’s blog on her loss while at the same time she’s vacationing in Florida is hard for some of us to handle. Another subject– Jennifer, really, HAVING, to talk to the pilot on the plane to Florida (and all air travel)—I’m afraid some of us do see that as the behavior of someone who is quite priviledged, who EXPECTS and DEMANDS to be heard, this is silly behavior which you brag about– leave the pilot alone and take another Xanax or for god’s sake go see a shrink finally– I choose to listen to your shows just about everyday, that doesn’t mean I have to like you ALL THE TIME—I’m sure Alexis would agree with me on that. You two and Paulie and Chrissie put on a very entertaining radio show.
Lidia R Kasarda says
Hi Jennifer,
I lost my extraordinary Mom nearly 12 years ago… she was 66, I was 30 and it was completely unexpected. Believing I could get through the incredible grief and pain seemed unimaginable. Simply peeling myself out of bed each morning in those first three months was a major accomplishment.
You will heal, even though the loss never leaves you, but then neither does she. You will find her living on in you with how you see the world, how you raise your children, how you love, the decisions you make and the words you speak. It’s not the same but in these ways, she is always with you.
Cry. Allow yourself to cry and wail and mourn.
Kind wishes go out to you and your family.
Lidia