Mommy, Today, on what would’ve been you’re 74th birthday, I will spend most of the day doing what you liked to do. I will kiss my kids, eat cake and wear diamonds. I will reorganize everything around me and spend time in my bed. The longer the time without you, the more gratitude I have for…
Moving Forward.
As leader of his high school’s Democrat Club, my son Jacob Hutt was asked to share his thoughts after yesterday’s election results at a school assembly today. With his permission, I am now sharing them with you. “I have to be true to myself and say I am saddened by the results of the national election….
The Scent Of A Mommy
It’s my mom’s birthday. She would be seventy-three years old today had she not died at sixty-five. My mom’s birthday is a super hard day because it highlights what should be in stark contrast to what actually is. My mom should be celebrating turning seventy-three. My mom is dead. I tried to avoid having feelings…
Cookies.
Since I lost my mom seven years ago and then lost about seventy pounds shortly thereafter, I haven’t baked all that much. Sadness and hunger for me get intertwined sometimes. Happiness, anxiety, and boredom can also trick me into thinking I’m hungry! Whenever I’m about to take a bite of something, it’s important for me…
25 Things I Learned From My Mother
6 years ago today my mom died. I’m trying to laugh today- instead of cry (not easy!) because my mom liked when we laughed. And she LOVED when we paid attention to her (sound familiar?!) 25 Things I learned from my mother 1. Cover soles of new shoes with scratch-less bottoms. Scuffed shoes look terrible…
Losing My Mother Defined Me, Unleashed Me and Changed Me
I was a guest on my brother Brian’s #TheMoment Podcast earlier this week, and it (of course) got me thinking (wait, I am always thinking!) about our mom. I think we all have some mixed up crazy part of our brain. But most of us have a bigger, healthier part of our brain that keeps…
44.
Stupid cancer. This is the 6th Mother’s Day without my mom. I’m 44 years old. And I feel my mom’s absence even more now than I did a few years ago. I think it’s because I’m in my mid life (or her 3/4 life!) and feel so much like I remember her to be….
‘Twas the night before high school…
I am starting high school tomorrow! No, I’m not. My son is. And I am emotional and anxious. I remember my ninth grade year as clear as day. I remember the Benetton logo striped shirt I wore THREE too many times. I remember my horrible perm. I remember walking through the hallways, seeing the older…
5 years later, my mom is still dead.
Crying in my bed because 5 years later, my mom is still dead. While she is frozen in time at 65 years old, I am getting older. My once excellent eyesight has changed. I need glasses. Like really. Things sometimes double when I look at them. I went to the eye doctor- ok I went…
Happy Father’s Day Daddy. I LOVE YOU!
My dad has two moods: happy and hungry. That’s slightly simplified but for the bulk of my life it did seem that way. Whether or not my dad was having a richer (or tougher work and/or) emotional life- he made sure we believed all was well at all times. And for the most part it…
An excerpt from my speech at the jewish home and some Mother’s Day thoughts…
Tomorrow is the 5th Mother’s Day without my mom. I hate this day. In my mom’s honor, here is an excerpt from the speech I gave at the JHE event last week. “LOSING MOMMY: I had this really cool radio show on siriusxm called whatever with alexis and jennifer, I was getting control of my…
Update about almost everything.
Past month. WOW. I celebrated my niece’s bat mitzvah: I celebrated my 43rd birthday at Barry Manilow and @soulcycle. (Thanks again EVERYONE!! Shout out to @soulcycle teacher @pedalmom Julie Dermer for fantastic bday ride and my sister @stacykfritz for being the all around…
Public Apology and a couple more books…
This morning while I was showering at my brother and sister in law’s apartment after my soul cycle class in NYC (Laurie Cole’s class was INCREDIBLE ahhhh)… I realized that I forgot to include my sister in law Amy Koppelman’s books in my book recommendations post. I am sorry Amy. I should have included your…
I’m a mom. And sometimes I post about my kids. They rock. My kids freaking rock!
Don’t yours? We are a society that often jumps at the chance to share the negative- Well today I feel like sharing the good stuff… the really really good stuff. SO… My son Jacob is so wise and so bright and so damn adorable. I feel lucky each day that he’s my son. I hear…
My Mom died almost 4 years ago. and I am still not over it.
Oh crap. It’s that time of year again when I am reminded in a more pronounced way that my mom has died. Most of the year, I can be offhandedly crude about losing her: Someone else: “how’s your mother?” Me: “She’s dead.” This is (obviously) a defense mechanism so I don’t have to feel (or…
